The one with the outcomes

Reminder: instead of a neat monologue, this is the whole conversation, typed word for word directly from my notebook. Let's see where we go from here ...

What’s on your heart? What are you saying?

You’re wondering what happened, where the time went recently after starting together so strongly, journalling together every day and it’s been, from your perspective at least, so many days but, from my perspective, it looks very different.

I’ve been here the whole time, loving on you, holding you, walking with you, carrying you, crying with you. You were never alone in any of the days, even when things felt difficult - especially when things felt difficult!

Would you prefer to stop sharing our conversations? Are you putting pressure on yourself that makes it feel difficult for you?

Quite honestly, I’m not sure. It’s possible I suppose but hearing you say that feels so silly, especially given how much I enjoyed the time we’ve had together.

Maybe it’s less about the actual journalling, because sitting and writing with you is never difficult. It’s more about the logistics because I know that if we do this, I’ll feel obliged to find the time to type this up and publish it, but I also don’t know where in the day to squeeze it in.

You’ve had a pretty intense few days. What if you permissioned yourself not to have to publish all our conversations right away?

That could work. But what about this conversation? Do people really need to read all of this? What would be the point?

What’s the “point” of publishing any of our conversations? Why did you start?

You tell me! I was simply following a nudge. I still don’t really know, see or understand the purpose of any of this. But I’m all ears, very happy to hear your thoughts.

That’s all I want in any of this. I want to move in your best and do and have and experience everything that you have for me.

Why does that make you feel angsty and on edge? You’re afraid of missing something, not hitting the mark, but what if I told you that that could never happen?

I’d ask you if you’re sure, even though you’re you and so of course you’re sure!

What if there was never any “mark” to hit? It was never about what you do and always about you being you.

But the reality is that there are things to do. Even if I ignored the nudges for more when I’m at home and just approached this from the perspective of work, it wouldn’t be enough for me to simply show up and “be”.

You know that that is not true! Part of you being you is about walking in all the gifts, talents and favour I’ve given you. If you didn’t move in those things, you wouldn’t be being you.

So it is about the “doing” as much as the “being?!

I did not say that!

What are you saying?

Stop worrying so much about the outcomes and instead, trust me in your life. Trust that I know exactly what I’m doing and so all you really need to do is move with me, flowing moment to moment, hearing and following the nudges.

If you can get to the end of a day and reflect that yes, we did it all together, that makes it a very good day, a very good day indeed!

And that extends to these conversations too?

It extends to everything, all of life, without exception. It’s not about stifling you, far from it. This is about empowering you with a freedom that only comes from doing life with me, intentionally and deliberately.

And this is not about micro-managing you, you’re not my slave, employee or robot, you’re my child. You’re my child to whom I’ve gifted a brilliant, creative mind - so don’t be afraid to use the mind I gave you.

Move with me, intentionally and deliberately, and prepare for a brilliant adventure far beyond your wildest dreams and imagination!

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You’ve been reading the next in a series of conversations. My intention is to keep journalling and sharing until I get a nudge to stop. I can’t promise a frequency and this is real life so I anticipate it might get messy. If either of those things bother you, feel free to click the “unsubscribe” button. I know this won’t be for everyone and so I won’t be the least bit offended.

That said, if you enjoy these conversations and know someone who would benefit from them, please share this email from them and/or suggest they follow along with the journey by subscribing.

In the meantime, thank you for reading and I look forward to sharing with you again soon!

Love El xox